My question to you is, what is your definition of a real friend? Once you have answered that question in your mind then ask yourself, "Are the people or person that I am labeling my best friend(s) really and truly are? You have to have standards when it comes down to making and picking friends. You must know where you want to place each person (I will explain the placing soon) that you are associating with in categories whether they are males or females.
- Associates: My definition of an associate in my black book is basically, people who I do not talk to hardly ever. I see them when I see them (I may have their phone number and never use it.) I also don't kick it with these type of folks. We might share a few laughs on the outside in public, but they won't never step foot in my house.
- Cool People: My definition of cool people in my black book is basically, people who I don't mind laughing with, telling my issues to, or getting sound advice from. They are the type of people I would not mind establishing a solid friendship with. Cool people in my book are also folks who have a really good since of humor and do not make me feel uncomfortable when I am around them.
- 411 Friends: Lord, where do I start with these types of people? Okay, well, to me in my black book (of course) these are people who know the gossip! The 411 friends are not messy, but they know all the mess and the low down on a whole lot of things. These types of folks will deliver you hot tea once it is received, and you want to know what is going on.
- Wise With Benefits / Business: Now, basically these people may be older than you by a few years or even more. These type of folks can sit you down and put you on game about a lot of real sh*t. If you having issues they have most likely been through it, so their advice is very valuable. Folks who are Wise With Benefits can help give your life more direction, and there is nothing like gaining a little more knowledge here and there.
- Best Friend: This is where I would basically place my best friend(s). This person or these people seriously mean so much to me. I really don't want to go into depth detail about my definition of a best friend, but feel free to add yours.
- The less they know is better.In other words don't go telling your business especially your personal business to this person or people. You are still interacting with them on a best friend level and honestly you don't need to send mix messages to these type of folks.
- Feed them with a long handle spoon.It is an old southern saying if you don't know. In other words you see them when you see them. Don't let this person or these people know your moves and what you are trying to get accomplished in your life --- start ignoring them.
- What is understood does not have to be explained.You know that they are he or she is not holding your best interest as a best friend, so what more time do you have to waste explaining to them to change in order to still have your friendship? Tomorrow is not promised.
- Don't Show How You Feel. If you may feel compelled to tell them or he or she, "What's really good." then words is better than your actions. Let them know calmly how you feel in the physically not over the phone, via email, or through someone else.
- Don't Throw Slangs.I am guilty of doing this over social networks such as Facebook, and it has gotten many friendships that I had with a few people down the drain. Basically, so much was and will be taken out of context. Your words will hurt people that theymost likely are not meant to. Honestly, you don't need any more unnecessary drama popping up.
Throw it in the gumbo!
If you need any advice on anything or you have suggestions on topics to talk about on this website email me at lindapatrick1993@gmail.com
@leenylynn